Connecting with your child

written by Chee Siong

This is one universal feeling that most parents definitely experience at some point in time. A handful of lucky parents will get this occasionally, while others may be dealing with this almost daily. What  is the actual problem? Why are their children not listening to them? The real problem is in the communication process.
This is a very common word with a deep meaning. We are all communicating daily, whether directly human-to-human, via gadgets, or communicating to devices. However, we all agree that when programmed correctly, most devices are extremely easy to communicate with. So what exactly is so difficult between human-to-human communication, especially when it comes to our children? Can we “programme” our children in a way that we can communicate well?

The answer: Underlying Needs
When we talk to our children, are we communicating to them at their level of needs? Here, I am referring to Maslow’s Hierarchy of needs. Instead of the basic levels of physiological or safety needs, I am targeting at the level of “love and belonging”. Have we asked ourselves, other than providing shelter, food, medical etc., have we forgotten the emotional need for love? Have we forgotten to fill up their “ love tanks” ?


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