Choosing the Correct Love Languages


This last article of the series will talk about the difficulties of using the 5 love languages, and how we can use this concept effectively.


In this series, I talked about the meaning of the 5 love languages and how as parents we need to find out which love languages our children prefer.


However, some people may say: "It is very easy, just fill up the 5 Love Languages quiz or test and you will get your answer!" While this may seem simple, it is only useful if you know exactly what to do with the information you have. Similarly, anyone who has worked with children long enough can easily point out one’s parenting style or if there is a lack of supervision. But what can one do after knowing one’s parenting style?


Hence, the crucial question is… “What’s next?” What should you do after you have figured out you and your child’s love languages?


Right from the start, I mentioned about how we should be filling up our children’s “Love Tanks” if we want to teach and impart values to them. They are always observing what we are doing, and trying to copy after us. When children copy and adopt our actions, we are unknowingly shaping their value systems. This is because they internalize our behaviours, and try to find meaning behind our actions. Hence, we cannot undermine the power of social learning. It is important for us to understand the concept of social learning, especially so in this digital age. Because once we are unable to fulfill our children’s curiosity, they turn to the cyber-world to learn. This will result in a lot more issues. Nonetheless, with proper parental guidance and strong emotional connection, you will still remain as the main source of influence for your child.


Over here in LoveTalks, we take an innovative approach towards traditional counselling. We have developed a series of structured sessions that can systematically and easily identify any missing love languages. In addition, we will go into the specifics such as how and when will these expressions of the love languages have the most impact. We will also help you analyse what are the missing components from your existing expressions of the love languages, and help you come up with improvised ways of conveying them. Our aim is to create meaningful interaction between you and your child, before you can start instilling values or guiding them.